Another pause

And He said to them, [As for you] come away by yourselves to a deserted place, and rest a while–for many were [continually] coming and going, and they had not even leisure enough to eat. – Mark 6:31

Coming from my damaged background, I’ve had to go through a vast amount of emotional growth and overcome an enormous amount of spiritual junk – just to get to where I am.

Well… I’m tired of going through emotional growth. Fed up and sick of it. It’s freaking never ending!

I’m tired of trying to help people who don’t want to be helped. I’m tired of hoping for the best for people whose hearts are not set on truth or love, but on tearing down and destroying.

I’m tired of being alone. I’m tired of being weird. I’m tired of selfish friends who don’t give back to me. I’m tired of not having enough from God to meet my needs. I’m tired of debt. I’m tired of rubbish teaching in the church. I’m tired of God’s promises that I don’t get… while other people get their promises right away.

I’m just tired. And I know that some of you know how I feel. hehehehe.

PS – Last night as I spent time with God, I began to look at the ministry of Jesus in a new light. How He mainly worked with people who embraced Him. Even while salvation is available for everyone, it is only effective for those who choose Him. And today in a comment Emily gave me some links that have great bible verses in them. I’ll blog about them when I return.

I’m really glad to say that I think I have somewhat of a go-forward plan.

God bless you guys,
Mark.
markrobertwilson @ gmail . com