A friend of mine got married recently…

A friend of mine got married recently to a really nice man who is a very committed Christian. They didn’t follow the prince-princess path, they simply liked each and spent time together and like turned into luuurve! So they got married. They both had previous marriages, they were both were fallen people with issues and stuff.

Was God at their wedding? Was their wedding a blessing to everyone who attended? Are they in love and happily married? You tell me… she sent me this email (she has not been reading my blog)

Well I still reckon marriage is all it’s cracked up to be and more!

I am over the moon at how much this guy loves me and keeps on showing it. We both feel a bit blown away by the enormity of what God has done in both our lives over the last few months.

The most awesome thing in the world, is to go to church and to be there worshiping God with everything in me and knowing my husband is right beside me doing the exact same thing. It’s brilliant to be pulling in the same direction and have that sense of unity of purpose.

All the stuff that went into the wedding really had God’s hand all over it. We really prayed that first and foremost God would be glorified in our wedding and that He’d have a chance to minister to ppl. It took all of 2 or 3 hours to work out the order of service and not much more than that to work out our wedding vows.

We had lots of interesting feedback from Christians and non-Christians. The Christians all thought it was great, and my friend’s comment (she’s not a christian) was that she was disappointed cause the focus was too much on God and not enough on us two…..I got off the phone and my hubby just said “Praise God!”

We really wanted it to be a challenge to the ones who hadn’t thought about the meaning of Christian marriage before, and the fact that it was a covenant.

I was at their wedding and it was a lovely event. Their vows expressed a Godly hope for each other… I was deeply touched and received a whole new hope for finding a partner who may not be perfect and the courtship may not be perfect and our lives may not be perfect… and yet God is such a good God that He will be in it and it will work wonderfully and beautifully.

You see, I am hoping that we can put away the pretentiousness and simply look for the humanity in each other. Then – using great care and good boundaries – we can engage one another and find a common dream. And then we make plans to live that dream out. Like the bible, finding a mate is really a practical thing. I feel that we can take something very natural and beautiful, and ruin it, by sticking a bunch of rules around it.

Jesus said…

Then he said to them, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath. – Mark 2:27

What did He mean? What He meant is that Deuteronomy and the laws (including the law to keep the sabbath as a rest day) was made to help us. We are not meant to come into domination by the laws, because we don’t exist for them. You see, we should be keeping the sabbath for our own health, not because it is a “law”.

In the christian movement I see the same “clone” mentality springing up in so many areas these days. We must not do this. The description that God gives of men and women are FOR us, they HELP us. It is something to aspire for WHILE we are IN a relationship. It’s not likely to be achieved BEFORE we’re in a realtionship.

If you are looking for someone who has kept the whole law, you’re in for a long long long wait. If you are looking for a man (or a woman) who fits the description of a perfect man or woman, then you’re in for a long long long wait.

So I think we should simply understand that there is no one “way” to do this relationship and male and female thing… and rather try to embrace real people (who might be broken) and then to embrace them as male or female – seeing the potential in them and comitting to working with them so they can achieve their best.

Embrace your life and enjoy it. Life was made for you, not you for life! Don’t come into a “law” mentality and expect yourself or others to fulfill the law. The law can never be kept. Embrace the reality of life and of people.

That’s my 2c.