Honesty is a solid foundation in relationhips


One of the things about me is that I try to accept other peoples choices for their own lives.

If someone lies to me, it tells me that they dont want me to know the truth about them. If you dont want me to know you, I wont push it. If you walk away or turn away, I will accept your decision and respect your right to choose for yourself.

I TRY (!) to live the scriptures and the one that applies here is: let your yes be yes, let your no be no (James 5:12).

Its not that Im unaware of being lied to. Im not stupid. Its just that I choose to accept your right to make decisions (which I may not agree with) in your life.

Whose life is your life? Is it mine? No. Your life is yours. You get to decide for you. And I show respect for people… by accepting their decisions for their own life.

Lying appears to be a big issue in society. And God expressly hates it.

These six things does the LORD hate: yea, seven are an abomination unto him:

A proud look, a lying tongue and hands that shed innocent blood, A heart that devises wicked imaginations, feet that are swift in running to evil, A false witness that speaks lies, and he that sows discord among brethren. – Prov 6:16-:19

God. Hate. Abomination. These are strong words.

In those 7 statements three of them are about some form of lying.

As far as I can (!) I try to avoid lying. I also avoid people who take refuge in lying or who lie to me.

If you lie to me, I will accept your choice to live your life in that way, but I wont be a part of it. Why? Because when I see someone lying about something small, I know for sure they will not be honest about big things. If I see you cave under the smallest of pressures, I know you wont be able to stand firm with integrity under the big pressures.

“Whoever can be trusted with very little can also be trusted with much, and whoever is dishonest with very little will also be dishonest with much. – Luke 16:10

Its not that Im stupid, its that I dont want to be involved with dishonety and distrust.

And look at the very next verse

“Therefore if you have not been faithful in the use of unrighteous wealth, who will entrust the true riches to you? – Luke 16:11

Being faithful in small things causes God (and others) to entrust TRUE WEALTH to you.

Honesty is a very important part of a foundation to build any kind of relationship on.

Without honesty I wont even BEGIN to build. Whats the point of building anything if the foundation is unable to support the weight of a building on it?

Something very beautiful can be built on a solid foundation of honesty (and openness) which naturally results in trust and safety for all involved.

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5 responses to “Honesty is a solid foundation in relationhips

  1. Hi Mark,
    first, I want to say very good post! This part caught the most of my attention…”If someone lies to me, it tells me that they dont want me to know the truth about them.” I admit, I was caught up in this (lying) when I was married because whenever I would tell my husband the truth about something, he didn’t want to hear it or didn’t believe it, so, I started to tell him what he wanted to hear (after I told him the truth) and in his mind, (I guess because he thinks the worst in people) only then was I telling the truth. He does this to the children too, I have seen/heard it for myself. anyway, now that I am free from that relationship, my life has become truth! God’s truth!
    thanks for sharing Mark!

    • Im sorry you went through that. Ive also suffered by being around people who lie constantly. I cannot stand it and I wont be around it at all.

      But Im glad you are in a much better place now. Live in the light 🙂

    • I want to say one more thing… Im keen to be in the position you are… in a loving relationship in which honesty is your daily life experience. Im eagerly awaiting her 🙂

      • Thanks again Mark! This relationship feels and IS soooo much different and better than what I was used to! Praying God blesses you with her soon!! 😀

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