I have had the desire to write this post for soooo long… months… but I needed to see a concise section of scripture.
I didn’t want a mish mash of lots of small bits and pieces. Praise God I got the passage of teaching in the last few days!
This teaching given by Jesus Christ is used for other puposes, so like me you may never have seen it in this light.
And for people who have been abused, or who have poor boundaries, or poor self esteem… this teaching will give you permission to protect yourself and to make better decisions.
In this passage of teaching (Matt 10:1-17) Jesus Christ has called His disciples to Himself. He is about to teach them. Who are His disciples? That’s you and me! 
1He called his twelve disciples to him …
He gave them a specific goal and told them to avoid people/places who are not in the specific goal… in other words, you do not need to be responsible for everyone you know, but for the people God sends you to.
5These twelve Jesus sent out with the following instructions: “Do not go among … 6Go rather to the…
Then He gave them advice to stay with “worthy” people. The AMP says “deserving”. You will see that later on Jesus warns against dangerous people, so the person you entrust should be someone safe.
11“Whatever town or village you enter, search for some worthy person there and stay at his house until you leave.
Now Jesus teaches them to evaluate the situation, to make a judgement. IS this a safe place for me? Are these people listening to me and hearing me?
13If the home is deserving, let your peace rest on it; if it is not, let your peace return to you.
And what’s more, if the people are NOT worthy – not safe, not reliable, not trustworthy – then move away from them. Don’t stay in an unsafe situation. If people don’t welcome you, leave them, go away from them!
14If anyone will not welcome you or listen to your words,
In fact, don’t just leave… shake the dust off your feet… don’t even take the dust with you, when you leave!
shake the dust off your feet when you leave that home or town.
Have you noticed? There is nothing meek and mild about this Jesus Christ – he has boundaries, common sense, assertivity and more!
Now Jesus tells us that there are wolves out there. And indeed there are!
16I am sending you out like sheep among wolves.
You are to be shrewd as a snake.
Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.
I think there are far too many Christians who refuse to be shrewd, and the wolves get them time and again. Perhaps they didn’t “search for” worthy people, and instead stayed with unworth people who were wolves?
And then Jesus drops the clanger. He knows our heart, he knows our desperation to get ahead and to succeed at the expense of others. So He warns us…
17“Be on your guard against men…
Not everyone is bad, but His sensible advice is to look around you, and be aware of what’s happening. If you spot a wolf then leave!
What can we learn from this teaching that Jesus gave His disciples?
- It is that you should be focussed on the work He gives you to do. You can’t be all things to all people. If He sends you to help someone, you don’t have to help everyone on your way there and everyone on your way back.
- People can be dangerous, like wolves, and you need to be on your guard. So you need to make good decisions, be wise, be shrewd.
- Don’t entrust yourself to just anyone and everyone… instead… seek our worthy people, and if you get it wrong and they are not worthy, then leave them, move on and shake off the dust that got onto your feet while you were with them!
But when you DO find worthy people, people who will listen to you and hear you… then stay with them. Not everyone is dangerous, but Jesus Christ is clearly teaching that SOME ARE. But when you find safe people, stay with them. There are good people in this world. You have to “search for” them as He says in v11.
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Great post and it gave me much to ponder. Thanks for sharing. Blessings
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” ALL SCRIPTURE IS GOD- BREATHED AND IS USEFUL FOR TEACHING, REBUKING, CORRECTING AND TRAINING IN RIGHTEOUSNESS.”
2TIMOTHY3:16
“FOR IT IS COMMENDABLE IF A MAN BEARS UP UNDER THE PAIN OF UNJUST SUFFERING BECAUSE HE IS CONSCIOUS GOD. BUT HOW IS IT TO YOUR CREDIT IF YOU RECEIVE A BEATING FOR DOING WRONG AND ENDURE IT? BUT IF YOU SUFFER FOR DOING GOOD AND ENDURE IT, THIS IS COMMENDABLE BEFORE GOD. TO THIS YOU WERE CALLED, BECAUSE CHRIST SUFFERED FOR YOU,LEAVING YOU AN EXAMPLE, THAT YOU SHOULD FOLLOW IN HIS STEPS.”
1 PETER2:19 – 21
“WHEN THEY HURLED THEIR INSULTS AT HIM,HE DID NOT RETALIATE; WHEN HE SUFFERED, HE MADE NO THREATS. INSTEAD, HE ENTRUSTED HIMSELF TO HIM WHO JUDGES JUSTLY.”
1 PETER 2:23
So… it seems that you are the kind of person who refuses to acknowledge other people’s boundaries.
That kind of person is called a “boundary buster” and they hurts other people by stopping others from being in charge of their own choices for their own life. That kind of person thinks they know better and they will make everyone else do what they want – they impose their view on others, denying the other person the freedom that God gave us.
As a result I will be deleting your comments from now on, with no further discussion on it.
JESUS REPLIED:”LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND. THIS IS THE FIRST AND GREATEST COMMANDMENT. AND THE SECOND IS LIKE IT. “LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOUR AS YOURSELF.” ALL THE LAW AND ALL THE PROPHETS HANG ON THESE TWO COMMANDMENTS.
MATHEW 22:37-40
LOVE HAS NO BOUNDARIES
Yes love DOES have boundaries. Please take a moment to actually read the bible.
When God’s wife – Israel – cheated on Him repeatedly, He divorced her. That was God having good boundaries.
In addition when Jesus Christ spoke to His disciples on the sermon on the mount, He taught them many good boundaries, like if the people dont listen then move on and shake their dust from your feet. He also said to not throw your pearls before swine… its just a waste of your time and effort! He also said that when you go into a new town seek for a WORTHY place to stay and ONLY stay there. These are all good teachings on boundaries.
As I said, please stop cherry picking the scriptures that you choose to believe. And even worse, stop teaching imbalanced and unbiblical nonsense to other people. Remember that teachers will be judged harder than others.
This discussion is now ended. If you post the same nonsense again you will have the ignomy of being the first person to be banned from this site. The first person in almost 1 million visitors.
That’s my boundary.
God bless you, Mark.
WE ARE CALLED TO LOVE ALL PEOPLE, EVEN OUR ENEMIES WITHOUT LIMITS.
FOR LOVE HAS NO BOUNDARIES
The fact of the matter is that Jesus Christ and God and the prophets ALL had boundaries.
Please update your theology to include ALL the relevant scriptures, not just the ones that you prefer to believe.
“IF SOMEONE STRIKES YOU ON ONE CHEEK,TURN TO HIM THE OTHER ALSO. IF SOME ONE TAKES YOUR CLOAK,DO NOT STOP HIM FROM TAKING YOUR TUNIC.”
LUKE 6:29
“IF YOU LOVE THOSE WHO LOVE YOU ,WHAT CREDIT IS THAT TO YOU? EVEN SINNERS LOVE THOSE WHO LOVE THEM. AND IF DO GOOD TO THOSE WHO ARE GOOD TO YOU, WHAT CREDIT IS THAT TO YOU? EVEN SINNERS DO THAT. AND IF YOU LEND TO THOSE FROM WHOM YOU EXPECT REPAYMENT WHAT CREDIT IS THAT TO YOU? EVEN SINNERS LEND TO SINNERS,EXPECTING TO BE REPAID IN FULL. BUT LOVE YOUR ENEMIES, DO GOOD TO THEM, AND LEND TO THEM WITHOUT EXPECTING TO GET ANYTHING BACK.”
LUKE 6:32-35
WE ALL HAVE BOUNDARIES
BUT GOD WANTS US TO OVERCOME OUR BOUNDARIES WHEN IT COMES TO LOVING OTHERS.
IT IS GOD’S WILL THAT WE LOVE WITHOUT LIMITS
FOR TRUE LOVE KNOWS NO BOUNDARIES.
“IF YOU LOVE THOSE WHO LOVE YOU ,WHAT CREDIT IS THAT TO YOU? EVEN SINNERS LOVE THOSE WHO LOVE THEM. AND IF YOU DO GOOD TO THOSE WHO ARE GOOD TO YOU, WHAT CREDIT IS THAT TO YOU? EVEN SINNERS DO THAT. AND IF YOU LEND TO THOSE FROM WHOM YOU EXPECT REPAYMENT, WHAT CREDIT IS THAT TO YOU? EVEN SINNERS LEND TO SINNERS, EXPECTING TO BE REPAID IN FULL. BUT LOVE YOUR ENEMIES, DO GOOD TO THEM, LEND TO THEM WITHOUT EXPECTING TO GET ANYTHING BACK.
LUKE 6:32 – 35
WE CAN ONLY DO THIS BY THE POWER OF THE HOLY SPIRIT.
GOD BLESS
john
Im sorry to be blunt, but thisis EXTREMELY bad advice. Jesus Christ taught that if you have TWO coats you give the one and you keep the other for youraelf. The point is this: we meet our own needs and we give out of the overflow. He did not ask us to give both coats and both shirts and sit with nothing for ourselves. But we are also not told to have more than we really need. Do we really need a big screen tv, or more than 1 tv?
God bless you
JESUS DID NOT SET BOUNDARIES. HE WAS LED BY THE SPIRIT.WE ARE CALLED TO FOLLOW IN HIS FOOTSTEPS. THE SPIRIT WILL TEACH US ALL THINGS. WHEN TO SAY YES – WHEN TO SAY NO. WE DO NOT NEED ANOTHER COUNCILLOR. WE ARE CALLED TO BREAK OUR BOUNDARIES. TO DIE TO SELF – PUT OTHERS BEFORE OURSELF – LOVE OUR ENEMIES – GIVE WITHOUT EXPECTING ANYTHING IN RETURN – LOVE OUR NEIGHBOUR AS OURSELF. THESE ARE GOD’S BOUNDARIES. THERE IS NO PLACE FOR US TO DRAW THE LINE HERE. THIS IS SUPERNATURAL. THATS WHY GOD GAVE US HIS HOLY SPIRIT. WE ARE CALLED TO WALK IN AND BE LED BY THE SPIRIT. WE ARE NOT OF THE WORLD. WE ARE CALLED TO BE HOLY.
And for those who cannot yet hear the Holy Spirit and are subject to abuse… I suggest that they have the same boundaries in place that God had and Jesus Christ had.
God also displayed good boundaries when He put away His wife because she cheated on Him and kept cheating on Him and refused to repent and change her ways. God displayed boundaries many times when He refused to listen or hear from us.
Thank You Jesus Christ, thank You God, for showing us what good boundaries are like… so that we can follow in your footsteps.
Where did Jesus spend his time on earth…? Thank God his boundaries were not prostitutes,weak of faith,those who denied him at the cricifixtion, a thief on a cross,and the prodigal son…..and thankfully me…..where would he go today?…..where the lost and hurting SINNERS were….WITHOUT BOUNDARIES…..your teaching is ME focused….and very very dangerous.
You are right Bill, Jesus Christ spent time with sinners – just like you and me. For God LOVED THE WORLD that while we were still SINNERS He sent His only begotten Son… etc.
If you read my other posts you will know I agree with this.
My post is about “boundaries”, it’s not about avoiding sinners! If you minister to hurt people you NEED to have boundaries in place.
God bless you, Mark.
Thanx for this blog spoke to my heart ,Lord bless
I’m very glad lissie!
Thank you Mark for your post on trust, boundaries, and assertivity. I was in a situation recently where I invited an old friend and her 15 year old son to live in mine and my husband’s home. We were enthusiastic to help them get on their feet. The agreement we had was for her to have a move out date so that our home was a temporary place for safety. But though she agreed to this it was not followed time and time again. She had a ton of excuses for not looking for a job or coming up with this date. I loved on her and her son and listened to her struggles. I worked with her on her struggles with time management and really tried to empower her. But, to no avail, I found that the excuses were too big for me (but not too big for God). A leader in my church advised that I send her to a homeless shelter. This was shocking to me. I had promised to give her 30 days notice, but the church leader said I wasn’t bound to my promise because she had not upheld her end of the bargain. I was terrified to carry out this, but I kept hearing again and again from others that this was the course I should take, because I was enabling my friend’s behavior. So, I wrote my friend a long letter. My husband and I decided to give it to her and ask her to go that night. We offered her $300 to stay in a hotel until her SSI check arrived. She would not go. We had to call the police. She told the police that she knew her rights and would not leave our home. The police said we had to get the legal documents and serve her with 30 days notice through the courts. At the courthouse we learned that we could file a domestic violence restraining order that encompassed a move out order within it. A judge granted this restraining order temporarily and the police came and removed her from our home. We had to go to court and a judge ruled in our favor for the restraining order to be in effect for 3 years. I have had much guilt over this entire scenario. Did I do the right thing? Did I do evil to her? Did I displease my LORD. Your blog was helpful to me today. Thank you. I know I did not do it perfectly, but my motive was to help and love my friend. God knows my heart. God has my friend and her son in His hands. He will provide for them where I could not. I love them and I pray for them daily.
Hi Julie
Thank you for sharing your story. Pls dont feel guilt at standing up for yourself.
And I hope that this bad experience doesnt deter you from helping people in future… dont stop loving, but DO put in place better safeguards and better boundaries so that this doesnt happen again.
I always say… DONT think that when someone walks up the driveway and into your house that they will somehow leave their ISSUES at the roadside and not bring them into your house. They dont leave their issues outside… the issues come in with the people. Whatever emotional or psychological instabilities got them into the messy situation you find them in… those same emotional or psychological instabilities will be constantly at work in their life, it doesnt stop just because you are helping them.
Im sorry… yes… there IS a cost to loving people. Jesus Christ told us to carry our cross… the cost of loving. BUT. Dont stop loving, but MAKE SURE you DO protect yourself more so that next time you can be very firm and clear about the boundaries from the word go.
God bless you,
Mark.
Dear Brother Mark Wilson you says ‘Jesus Christ told us to carry our cross…’
This word is very clear word. I like to live that way… Thank you brother
Brother this message (Walking In Jesus’ Footsteps) is very useful to us…
GOD BLESS YOU Brother Thank you…